Big Country Blues Trailer

Big Country Blues Trailer
Sarah e Jacobs recognized as OUTSTANDING ACTRESS IN A DRAMA SERIES at LA Webfest! And nominated for BEST ACTRESS IN A DRAMA at ITVFest! Click to watch the trailer!

Tuesday, April 6, 2010

Performing with Paper-Cuts

So what's the news?.... because I have been running around like a mouse in a maze for the past week and have neglected my poor, lonely blog. I lay awake at night feeling guilty about it (you think I'm joking...) Here's the news:

The auditioners from last week did not listen to the hints of the universe and I did not get a call-back. Balls. It sucks because I know that I would have killed that part. I guess I just didn't kill the audition. It's an unfortunate feeling, wanting a do-over. I don't think I took enough risks at the audition. Looking back I think I actually read pretty blah. Oh well. Nothing I can do now except try not to suck at the next one.

My show opened and it's going well. We remembered all of our lines and I felt decent about my performance. It's an interesting part for me because I can't really get a read on the performance. I know that the audience seems to respond with laughter. And our play is a comedy of sorts, so that's a good thing.

I've had a few performances since opening night and they all seem to go fine. Ryan (the BF) saw it and said we were very good and had a great chemistry together, which is great news. On Monday after our show I was walking out and ran into our director. I asked if he had any notes and he said, "Yes! For you. I don't know what is wrong with you." Now how the hell am I supposed to respond to that? I immediately felt horrible and decided that I sucked at life. Then he said, "Don't get me wrong, you're VERY good." Stress on the very. Now what the hell is going on?! Something is wrong with me, but I'm still VERY good. I was so confused, and slightly pissed. Could he get to the constructive part, please? "You have a very intimate performance. You're connected to him and very 'in it' but you need to share it more with the audience. Let your voice go. You need to hit the back row. Be louder, I think." Finally! The constructive part. I listened intently and took it in. Interesting. I'm not a very over the top performer, and I know that. I like to keep my performances very truthful. (I hate watching over-performers.) I said that I think I was trying to control my rage because I play a sort of dim girl and I'm in a restaurant, and that maybe that was contributing to the lack of projection. He said to control it, then let it go- all out. I asked if we could run the show before our next performance and if he could help me point out the parts that I need to make louder. He agreed. So I'm looking forward to that tonight. I love rehearsal! (that looks like I could be being sarcastic, but I'm not. I really am looking forward to it, and I really do love rehearsal :)

I've worked a few odd jobs in the past week. Flyering here and there, Beer girl one night, temping some more. Now you see why I've had a hard time blogging? I get home at night and my brain is done. Between rando jobs, performances, remembering lines, auditions, and even just keeping my schedule straight, I get home and I just want to eat and sleep. I could have written but it would have been shit, I'm sure. I didn't want to subject you to that!

The weather is getting nice, which makes flyering SO much more enjoyable. I spent the last few days working the morning shift flyering, then temping all day. I'm at the same office I was in a few months ago, filing away the next set of reviews. It seems all this company does is review their employees. When do they get anything done? My hands are sufficiently paper-cut. Enough that putting my nightly alpha hydroxy-laced lotion on my face was a disaster that ended in my screaming and running for the faucet to rinse my haggard hands.

Working the two jobs back to back really did shine some insight into people. In the morning I spent two hours watching people look at me like they were better than me because I was handing out flyers on a street corner. In the afternoon I spent the day in an office, probably much like the ones those judgmental people work in, wishing I was outside in the beautiful weather. I even missed flyering. There are no windows, just yellow fluorescent lighting. The biggest news was that American Idol was on that night. I just want to scream at those people that look down their noses at me, "I happen to think that YOUR life sucks!" and maybe add a "Bitch!" in there. Although that may be harsh. On the other hand, maybe they sit at a computer all day and think, "at least I'm not handing out flyers on the street." Haha. We all tell ourselves what we have to, I guess. Maybe it's all they have to think that they're better than I am. Maybe that's how they get through their day.

I just wish people were nicer, really. Don't run into me like I'm not there, don't wave your hand in my face because you don't want a flyer, don't grunt like I'm the worst thing that happened to you all day. Have a heart, people.

This weekend is going to be insane! I'll lay it out for you (get excited):
Friday night: Show
Saturday day: Show
Saturday night: Filming episode 4 of Date to Mate!
Sunday day: Filming
Sunday night: Show
Monday day: Temping
Monday night: Filming
Tuesday: SLEEP

Whew. I'll need a few red bulls to get through this one. Thanks for reading and I'm sorry to neglect you. You are all very important to me... whoever you are.

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