Big Country Blues Trailer

Big Country Blues Trailer
Sarah e Jacobs recognized as OUTSTANDING ACTRESS IN A DRAMA SERIES at LA Webfest! And nominated for BEST ACTRESS IN A DRAMA at ITVFest! Click to watch the trailer!

Wednesday, May 18, 2011

Don't Stress about Life, There're Cocktails in Hell

So I'm in considerably better spirits this go 'round. I've slept -which is key. I've said "no" to some things that I usually wouldn't have been able to. I've just, generally, taken care of myself.

That being said, I'm still a skoch lost. I think I've always been one of those people operating on my own time. I wait things out until the world pushes me. My mom always says when I was born I was in no hurry. I stayed in a stroller until I was so big I was shoved in the damn thing like a sausage. When learning to drive I wouldn't turn left onto Earl Dr. when I was told because it led out to the main road and I was only comfortable in the neighborhood. But we all know that once my time came, I accepted the challenges and never looked back. Once out of the stroller, you couldn't get me to stop dancing from place to place. Once onto Earl Dr. I had the windows down and the radio on. I think I just wait for the world to let me know I'm ready. And this past week, the world has been screaming at me like a two year old in the candy isle. Consider my attention, gotten. World, I hear you. You can shut the hell up now.

I've had many conversations in the past week about what's next and I feel closer to an answer, but not quite there yet. I have faith that I will work it out and I trust in the order of the universe. All will be right. As Rilke (my favey-fave) says, "wish that you may find patience enough in yourself to endure, and simplicity enough to believe; that you may acquire more and more confidence in that which is difficult... And for the rest, let life happen to you. Believe me: life is right, in any case." ...he's such a freakin' smarty pants.

The rest of my week last week cruised along at a steady state of "kinda shitty," to be honest. Well, until the weekend. I had my first tour group complain (in my defense they were crazies. I could NOT please them, no matter how hard I tried...and Lord knows, I tried.) But that's okay, because in the same week, I got two five star reviews - So screw the crazies. I had some more work shifts that seemed to defy the rules of time. On a happy note, I celebrated a good friend's graduation from grad school, and I went to support some talented friends in a one act play competition.

Perhaps the coolest of the weeks events came on this past Monday when I went to Inside the Actor's Studio (I have a bestie who works closely with THE James Lipton :) . It was the cast of Modern Family - in my opinion the best show on television. I loved every second of it. I soaked it in and listened as they all went through their super normal childhoods and supported each other as they recounted how they got to where they are. There really is nothing like being a part of a cast. It's a closeness that's hard to find elsewhere. I found it pretty inspiring. Not because of their talk about craft or process, but because they talked a lot about insecurities and what its like being an actor. Julie Bowen quoted her castmate Ty Burrell by saying, "Acting is fear management. It's all about controlling your fear." She talked about trusting in everyone else that she's doing a good job, because she can't tell. She said at one point, "I keep waiting for everyone to find me out. Realize that I'm not really supposed to be here." I loved her for saying that. We really are all the same. Same questions, same fears, same dream. It really doesn't matter where we fall on the spectrum of success.

I followed up with the Discovery Channel Callback and I'm still in the running! Just as I suspected they are taking some time with the project. So I should hear from them soon. I have some auditions coming up and I'm doing a staged reading with the PlayClub of Stop Kiss. I play Sara, the midwestern transplant and dabbling lesbian with an unfortunate fate. I'm having a blast working on it. That's Wednesday.

In the meantime I guess I'll work out the rest of my hot disaster...I mean, my life.

...That is if we live past the Zombie Apocalypse on Saturday. If not, well...I may be seeing you in hell. You bring the crudite and I'll make a signature cocktail: The Burning Bellini. Its champagne with a fireball dissolving into bubbles. :) delish.


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