Big Country Blues Trailer

Big Country Blues Trailer
Sarah e Jacobs recognized as OUTSTANDING ACTRESS IN A DRAMA SERIES at LA Webfest! And nominated for BEST ACTRESS IN A DRAMA at ITVFest! Click to watch the trailer!

Monday, August 29, 2011

Was That a Hurricane or Did a Pigeon Just Shit on My Head?

Seriously? Seriously? An earthquake AND a hurricane? Seriously?!!

Let's start at square one (and by "square" I mean "natural disaster"). I was grocery shopping for some fresh produce in a health food store in my hood. I took the time to squeeze each stone fruit and inspect each leafy green. I found the cereal I wanted. Then the cashier says to me in broken spanglish, "No internet. No card." I got kinda pissy because I had no cash and she's talking up a storm to the lady behind me completely unconcerned with my waste of time. "You feel?" she asked as she gyrated her whole body like a floppy banana peel. "Uh...I'm sorry?" I answered, completely confused and slightly creeped out. She said something to me in Spanish (LOTS of people think I speak Spanish. I don't. Well, un poquito). "I... don't speak Spanish." "Earthquake! Earthquake!" The woman behind me piped up energetically. "You feel?!" "Nope. Nope, ladies. I did not feel an earthquake." Nuts. I walked away, leaving behind my perfectly chosen produce and rolling my eyes at the crazy ladies squawking behind me.

I went to another grocery to re-shop and as I was checking out the woman says to me, "how crazy was that earthquake?" "What?! Really?! Those bitches weren't crazy...?" (I said the second part under my breath). I was still skeptical until I got a text from my mom in GA. 2 reactions to this: 1. Confirmed the whole earthquake thing 2. There's an earthquake and my Mom sends a TEXT?! ...I mean, yeah, I didn't FEEL it...but still.

So a few days later I go to see my friend in a Fringe Festival show (big theater fest here in town) and guess who is sitting right in front? The casting director that I met with just a few weeks before! Hello! Sign! (cough*call me in for an audition*cough) Anyhow, as I'm taking my seat next to the CD, two old women create quite a fuss as they are trying to get up the stairs to their seats and one topples over on the other! They fall DOWN the stairs, tumbling to a hard thud on the ground one on top of the other, moaning like cows in heat ( cows go into heat? Hmm...). The audience screamed and instinct set in for me and one other girl. We rushed over to the ladies and tried to get them to stay put while someone called an ambulance. I stayed there getting their names (Blanca and Ros) and ages (Ros said 55...pretty sure she's been 55 for 20 years). They were something else! Blanca was in a ton of pain the other just WAS a pain. "I'm not going to the hospital with you, Blanca! I'm not goin'. You are alone." Cool it, Ros! I think Blanca broke her hip for God's sakes.

In the middle of the madness another crazy on the other side of the theater started yelling into a phone and sobbing hysterically. It was MADNESS! In the end both ladies went to the hospital and we watched the show without further interruption. But WTF?! Remind me not to spend my whole life in this town. It's great for a while, but I've never met a super-sane old lady that's been here forever. I'm pretty sure this town turns a girl bananas after a while. I'm sure as hell feelin on my way.

AND THEN not a day later there's hurricane hoopla. Now I'm getting textS from my mother about this. Of course I'd heard about the possibility, but it takes a lot to get NYers concerned about much of anything. But not Moms. If I was underwhelmed with her reaction to the earthquake, she made up for it with natural disaster number two. I'd wake up in the morning to hilarious manic texts about filling the bathtub. Sample text:

"Hurricane prep? Water? Flashlight? Could lose power. Consider going to Jay and Mindy's? Could be couple days without power. Possible."

Verbatim. There were others.

I packed up the hundred dollars of non-perishables, bottled water, light sources and magazines (hurricane's are freakin' expensive) and headed for my friend's apartment in Astoria- An Evac free zone. We spent the day gathering rations and walking around trying to tire out her 2 dachshunds so they didn't crap all over the apartment in the coming days. Then...we waited. And waited. Did I mention that we waited? We sat there sweating our faces off in the humid apartment devoid of a window unit, as per Bloomberg's advice. I ate my weight in Lentil chips with salsa and cheese dip and apple slices (I at least TRIED to mix in a healthy snack or two). I successfully and shockingly avoided the pizza! August fitness challenge: 1 Hurricane: 0 though, there were a few PB and J's to be had. I went over lines. I stuck my head out the window. I developed a crush on Eric reporting from Virginia Beach as I watched him rain soaked and blowing in the wind on the Weather Channel. I read about cravings and healthy fats. I slept. I slept some more.

What the shit, Irene?! Take your damn time, Lady! What a bitch. I mean, is this or isn't this? They were still on TV blowin' around like idiots, they were still saying the worst was yet to come, they were still talking about the destruction that was ahead... But when?! Whennnn?! I spent the night in and out of sleep on a chair in front of the television waiting for the black clouds of doom to descend on our little apartment bunker and knock us back into the dark ages. Needless to say...that didn't happen.

What did happen was we went crazy. We lost our damn minds cooped up, bored senseless, eating crap and waiting on pins and needles. In-Sane. My friend (shout out Elesha!) started yelling out the window at passersby (that's right- PASSERSBY. Some hurricane) telling them to "get in out of the danger! There's danger! Hurricanes are danger!" Most people just laughed at us and asked if we need beer. The next afternoon I was exhausted! Turns out all the preparation and waiting is enough to knock you out. I hopped in a cab and came back to BK to check out the scene. Some branches were down.

For as much as we joke (was that a hurricane or is someone's air conditioner leaking? Hurrican't. Irene's like my 9th grade gf, all talk and no action, Hurri-lame!), we really do owe a big ole' THANK YOU to the southerners for taking that one like a champ. We would not have been able to enjoy the beautiful day today if Irene didn't dwell on North Carolina and become lesbian lovers with Virginia. Not to mention that Vermont is underwater. So Bless you folks because we here in NYC really were the lucky ones, and you guys-not so much.

At some point in the middle of this week of madness I managed to Celebrate a bestie's birthday (shout out Kel), hand out some flyers, rehearse for a reading, get my metabolism tested (SUPER slow for the amount I work out. Great news. 1200 calories a day it is...fml), bartend for the first time (not my forte), have a drunken night of terrible decisions (that I'm still recovering from/dwelling on), and listen to some nutrition lectures.

Holy hell. Life is eventful! There's a lesson here somewhere... You can't go through all this bullshit and not learn something (Sorry, TGIF was my jam as a kid. DJ and Stephanie ALWAYS learned something)... So here goes: Really there are so many big things to worry about in life that dwelling on the small, stupid things just seems self indulgent. Shit happens. Shit happens and we move on. Just like this city after an earthquake and a hurricane.

...I mean a ground shimmy and a rainstorm.

Sunday, August 14, 2011

Just a Girl Gettin' All Hot and Bothered

It's that brilliant excitement about life and possibilities that keeps me going (just what I told cute boy- I mean jerk- at the bar a la my last post that never called. But whatevs because he probably has communication problems and halitosis anyhow). I certainly don't live with that excited feeling all day every day, but I do spend the majority of my days working towards it. I'm lucky, really, that I found performing to feed my need. I know that there are people out there that have no idea what it means to have this energy in their body, to feel so inspired that you have to get up and get to work. The feeling like you have to move or you may explode. I'm even luckier that I feel like I've found a second source of this energy. Folks, turns out I'm a big fat tree hugger. Yup, I'm finding that the health and nutrition industry actually suits me quite nicely.

It seems I'm okay with spending a Friday night in sweatpants researching how my Mother can calm her arthritis for her upcoming trip to Paris with diet. And, I'm okay with spending an afternoon reading about what to eat to optimize marathon running for a bestie that's in training or what foods increase fertility for some peeps in my life that are tryin' to get knocked-up. And I surprise myself at the level of pumped I become when an article about new food label designs pops up on my twitter feed. It's getting ridiculous...and I love it.

So, school is going well. I got concerned because of all the questions being thrown at me about how exactly I'm going to structure my business. "I don't know, fool!" I found myself yelling at my Ipod full of lectures. But, I spoke with my health coach who has been through the process and she has calmed my nervous energy and refocused my intentions and I am back on track simply gaining all the info I can (don't I just sound all tree-hugggy and holistic? ;) But in seriousness, I really can't wait to gain all the knowledge to make this whole shebang look like something. I can't wait to simplify my life and boil it down to two things that get me all hot and bothered. Can't. Wait.

Buuuut, In the mean time... I'm doing some, get this, promos! Mostly chips and cafes. Riveting. (...but I guess it's not tampons. Everything's relative.) I've done a bunch of shopping tours- some in the POURING rain, which was just a great time. I love keeping a cheery disposition as I trudge through the town, my clothes weighted down with probable acid rain while I drag along dripping wet tourists and pull "supercute" outfits for them to try on. So fun. (But I guess I'm not sweating my face off. Again- relative.) I've also taken on choreographing the first dance for a couple on their wedding day in the style of 500 Days of Summer. That's actually been a pretty good time spent with good people. I win with that one.

I filmed a scene for a friend's webseries. It happened to be on one of the muggiest days yet in an apartment ram-jammed with people and no air conditioning. Lord only knows what kind of sweaty, swamp-assy disaster we all looked like on camera. I'm sure you're shocked to hear that by the end of that evening I was sure that I was going to pass out. It's hard because not everyone has this reaction to heat like I do (read: freaks that do "hot yoga"). So when I become a bit irritable, request breaks and sit outside trying to calm my boiling blood (a whole other kind of hot and bothered), I'm hyper aware that I'm being the diva in the room and I hate it. I'm also aware that if I don't do that, I may just up and die. Soooo, Give and take, people. Give and take.

I was even able to fit in a little vacay, too, recently! I stayed at a friend's family house in the Hamptons. It was so nice to be out of the city and see a little greenery for a hot minute. Unfortunately my body shuts down for 72 hours every time it gets the hell out of this town...and I was only gone 48. So, needless to say, while I did ENJOY some kickass farmstand peaches, I WAS no peach. Very tired. May have taken a nap. or two. or twelve.

I also had some very successful readings. One in which I got to play the demanding role of a girl in an abusive relationship seen throughout the years of her life. Smart, funny, sassy and fucked up-my kinda girl. ;) During the rehearsal process, I sufficiently freaked the hell out of the girl subletting the room next to mine in my apartment with a monologue of hyper-emotional proportions. Definitely wasn't aware she was home at the time... oops. Ah, well. I mean she still talks to me, just from a further distance. Currently, I'm in rehearsals for a September show of original short plays and for another reading where I play a delicious character that fits the "smart, funny, sassy and fucked up" bill. (trend?) This one includes incest... Can we all just all take a minute and thank God I'm not Method...

Anyhoo, in personal news, I've been dealing with some former roommate bullshit (anyone need a hideous couch, a hideous dresser or a hideous shelf? Yeah, ME EITHER!). I hate people. Now for a subject I rarely divulge: Boys. Boys, at the moment, are of minimal interest to me. Simply too much energy, not enough return on investment. I'm just not one to enjoy the decoding of the text messages. And I find it hard to balance the honesty and the I've stopped trying. And, while I'm being so honest, it really feels nice.

Moving on! I can feel fall around the corner these days and it is freaky. This could be the fastest summer of my life. Hell, this could be the fasted YEAR of my life. I hear time speeds up the older you get. All the more reason to spend it excited about the days that are to come.

And so, my friends, Onward ...and, God willing, upward.

Thursday, August 4, 2011

Maintain the Mess with Monumental Amounts of Momentum

I met a guy at a bar. He was a finance guy. In trying to explain my life to him (always a challenge), he looked at me like a caged zoo animal and asked me, "What keeps you going?"

"Umm. Excitement. B Vitamins. ...and a shit load of momentum."

Which brings me to...Holy hell! Where do I even start?
In summation:

Merry Meeting, the one-act I was rehearsing, opened and closed- some people laughed, some didn't. I auditioned for 10 commercial agents and casting directors- successfully DIDN'T wet myself, successfully DID do a dinosaur impression. Met with a casting director, got great info. Had my first health coaching session with my mentor, ironically...from a McDonalds. I handed out some chips, I handed out some panty liners. Passed out flowers to those getting gay-married down at City Hall (a truly amazing experience). Interviewed prospective roommates and successfully found a normal subletter. Worked out like a crazy person. Met with a commercial print agent. Designed some marketing materials. Met with a fellow Nutrition school student. Rehearsed for a reading. And thank God for those few cocktails I fit in in the middle... (no, seriously. I think I actually said Grace before that delicious pickle back shot on Saturday).

Now to delve into a few details: I decided to attend a "Commercial Night" at The Actor's Green Room (which rocks, btw). Forgot when I scheduled it, however, that my first health coaching session was immediately before (for nutrition school we're assigned a personal health coach to guide us through and help us out) and it was at a non-negotiable time. I got to the neighborhood of the audition and wouldn't you know it-when you need a damn Starbucks they can't be found. I walked and sweated and sweated and walked. Finally I settled into a seat at the Mickey D's to talk to this lady about my health habits (I found the irony in this hilarious. Perfectly in line with the rest of my life). My coach was lovely. We chatted and the 50 minutes flew by.

The audition went well, too! The people were great-Super helpful and supportive. I made new friends in the waiting room. Super laid back atmosphere. Perfect for me to bitch-slap my nerves and put 'em into check. I had one goal for this audition: Stay cool, calm and myself. Just do my thing...and Lord knows I had time to focus, because I was the very last person to go. I entered the room which had two walls lined with various Industry people. Industry people that just wanted to go home after a looooong night. Umm, can ya say intimidating?! Before I even got my name out I was asked to perform the "Sweet Dinosaur Impression" special skill that's on my resume. So, after a short intro, I busted up my face and hissed and jumped around like a flesh eating beast. There ain't no shame in my game- better believe it woke the room right up.

I did well and have since had two meetings from it. One with a Casting Director and one with a Print Agent. Both meetings were good! I was myself. I was collected and fairly charming without being irritating...I think. Now I just have to keep the relationships going and see what happens from here. (p.s. the casting director said he called me in because I seemed so at ease in the audition and that I was very "cool and chill" at the meeting. Funny story, because it was Friday-hottest day of the year. 110 degrees. What he doesn't know is that I spent the 15 minutes prior to the meeting freaking out from heat stroke, hanging with the door man and drying out my clothes over the air conditioning vent. "Do whatcha gotta do, Girl!" the doorman said with absolutely no judgment as I lifted my shirt and reveled in the cold air blasting up my sweaty self. I think I was audibly moaning. Classy, I know. But, I would say, Goal Cool Calm and Collected: Accomplished.)

So, there's a lot going on, so much to think about! I'm winded y'all. I feel like my head does not belong to me anymore. Even when I dedicate my time to one thing my head is somewhere else. I'm officially concerned. I can't seem to pull it together, to get organized. And, I was doing so well with the sleeping, but I can toss that right out the window along with my sanity. I find myself staring wistfully at babies that go by in strollers and NOT because I'm feeling that internal clock ticking. It's because I'm jealous. "There goes another ass hole baby, stretched out, just napping like it's nuthin'." ...This is a problem.

Anyhow! I've connected with a surprisingly normal girl from my holistic nutrition class (she didn't even flinch when I told her I don't like yoga!). We're going to try to meet once a week to keep on track with school. Thank God! And I guess I'll just keep riding on that momentum and do as the very accepting doorman said, “what I gotta do.” ...move my acting career forward with more meetings and events, rehearse for upcoming readings, audition for new things, make money with promotions and shopping tours, try to have a social life (what can I say, that boy at the bar was cute), oh, and work out like a crazy doing that August fitness challenge I signed up for...

...all while trying not to rage and kill any slumbering babies in the process. Amen to that.


p.s. Try saying the title five times fast. It's kinda fun...