Big Country Blues Trailer

Big Country Blues Trailer
Sarah e Jacobs recognized as OUTSTANDING ACTRESS IN A DRAMA SERIES at LA Webfest! And nominated for BEST ACTRESS IN A DRAMA at ITVFest! Click to watch the trailer!

Wednesday, September 21, 2011

Questioning the Kool-Aid and Kicking the Kilter With a Little Kumbaya

I lived through last weekend! I was able to do it all, shuffling my little booted feet around this town with the quickness! The nutrition school conference was my home base, and I popped in and out fairly seamlessly missing minimal "must-sees". I darted from nutrition geek to thespian to dancer to student to friend without missing a beat (well except for that moment I was trying to return an email as I got out of a cab and got my foot caught in my handbag strap. I have no idea how I did that and the cabbie said it was graceful... but, I'm pretty sure I missed that beat).

The conference was an experience. We all know, for me, honesty is generally favored. So...honestly, I have mixed reviews. Saturday there was a whole lot of Kool-Aid being passed around. And I've just never been one to blindly drink the Kool-Aid. I smell it, ask what's in it, what flavor, when it was made, what will it do for me, wait until someone else tastes it and doesn't die...then MAYBE I'll subscribe to a sip. It's just my nature. So day one of the conference was a lot of me sitting in a chair with one eyebrow raised (and those that know me personally, know that I mean this literally :). Sunday, however, instead of TALKING about being inspired and motivated I actually WAS inspired. The day was full of fantastic information about breakthroughs in nutrition and weight loss. About reversing the obesity epidemic and shutting down cancer and curing diabetes. LOVED IT! It really was a fantastic reminder of my passion for this whole nutrition shabang and I left Sunday with a renewed vigor to spread the nourishing news.

I also auditioned for Sleep No More on Saturday (a show here in the city I am DYING to see. Theater's so damn expensive we actors can't afford it). We did some movement improv exercises. It was held in the actual space where the show takes place and were to move about the "dining room" like we were gathering information from the room with our bodies. We were then to interpret the information, develop an opinion about it and react as such. Guess I gathered the wrong info because I was cut after the first round. But I had a blast! Unfortunately I didn't get a chance to perform that classical monologue I learned and practiced while on a bench in the projects across the street (during which, I was continuously interrupted by an old woman that wanted to cook me "the best fuckin' beans and rice I ever ate" and dodging a group of little boys that broke out into a very intense war with water bottle machine guns. It took some resolve not to ditch the audition and join the resistance).

Also got some new pics taken. Through a friend a photographer was offering a great deal and I thought it beneficial to take advantage. So... Sunday, at the tail end of Deepak Chopra's talk, I busted a move and ran downtown to have my pictures taken (a funny microcosm of my life when I go from taking in all of Deepak Chopra's zen energy and brilliance to hightailing it outta there like a mad woman. I laughed to myself). Now, I just have to review the pics and figure out what to do with them. Here are a couple samples:

Feel free to tell me what you think. I'm a terrible judge of my own pictures. Particularly when I'm acutely aware of what went into them: conference center all day, make up in the cab, whopping 20 min to shoot before tacking the name tag ­on and morphing back into a student.

In the days since my schizophrenic weekend I have tech-ed and dress rehearsed the new show. I also tried to control my freak-out-mode that results from being incredibly under-rehearsed.

Which brings me to last night. Opening Night. My first scene was a cluster f*ck (pardon the expression) of jumped lines, missing lines, zig zagging through the script. The scene has tons of irritatingly similar text messages being sent back and forth, human sound's difficult not having had the proper rehearsal time. And so, it was hot mess. But we lived through it. And, oh well, there's always tomorrow.

One other scene I was struggling with came together for me at dress rehearsal when I asked the new director what I was doing wrong and he looked at me and said, "I mean, your shit's not Hamlet." Holy hell! It clicked! I got it. Chill out and bring back the levity. I went home and worked on it and, last night, it GREATLY improved my performance and the scene as a whole. So, while I effed up the first, the second went pretty well and the third (the one in which we switched roles last week) went well, also. So two outta three ain't bad. least, at this point, that's what I keep telling myself when my mind starts dwelling on the one I screwed up.

I gotta find my center, again. This show has me completely off kilter. I feel very out of sorts and I don't like it. I feel like I've been grasping for something to save me from myself, and well, we all know nothing will. Gotta get all Hug-a-Tree/Kumbaya with some relaxation and turn my attention back inward. Stay focused.

Gosh...all that kinda sounds like I not only sipped the Kool-Aid, but funneled that shiz at a granola themed frat party. But... hell, whatever works!


  1. Ok, something tells me that sundry friends and colleagues -- perhaps overcome with shyness at the *gasp* prospect of commenting on a blog -- have privately messaged you with feedback about these great shots. The four shots you've shared here have you working much loveliness and charm. Having said that, the four convey different moods -- with the top two, the lower left one, and the lower right one, respectively, presenting three very different, though equally engaging, faces. Evidently "conference center all day, make up in the cab, whopping 20 min to shoot before tacking the name tag ­on and morphing back into a student" is a process that works. There's energy there.

    (Granola-themed frat parties, funnels -- interesting...)

  2. Ok, so I'm a bit behind in reading your blog. I'm sorry. Shoot me. Good lord you're busy. I thought I was running around like crazy but look at you? I don't think you stop running. I don't blame you with the kool-aid. I tend to avoid at all costs. I mean we all know what happens to large groups who drink it. So wise on your part. But I'm glad you let yourself open up on the second day and really absorb what was going on.
    Now..sleep no more? How did you get an audition for that? Where was this posted. I'm pissed. I would LOVE to be in that. Punch Drunk is an amazing company. Sadly like you said we theater-makers can't afford to see theater. Something wrong there I think. Headshots headshots headshots..I'm know I'm late in commenting but have you made any.."head"-way yet in choosing one?