The Scene: The Subway
Close my eyes.
Breathe. ...Smile. ...Breathe. ...Dance
a little on the inside. Breathe. Smile.
Open my eyes.
(strangers are staring...)
Close my eyes.
Breathe. Smile. Breathe. Dance a little
on the inside. Breathe. Smile.
This is how I prepare for an audition.
I generally don't do vocal warmups or yoga in the waiting room. I
don't do tongue twisters or make ridiculous noises or salute the sun
before a scene. If it works for you, great (though I will probably
judge you...gonna be honest). It's just not me.
What is me is reminding myself that
life is funny. Things are not a big deal. Nothing is the end of the
world (except of course the end of the world. But if you'll remember,
much to the chagrin of the crazies that sold all of their belongings
last year, that Armageddon situation got pushed back to a later
date). So let's all just calm down. That's what I say to myself
before an audition: “No big deal. Let's all just calm down.”
I'm an on again off again control
freak. I CAN get overwhelmed and I CAN shut down. It's when this
happens that my work tends to suffer and things don't really go my
way, anyway. So, occasionally, when I do revert to
my “death grip on life” tendencies, I have to take a break. Do
some writing. Listen to some music. Work out. Eat well. And find the
funny again.
For a minute I was a little white knuckled, but I took a little breather
Hell, things are downright hilarious.
Oh, example, you ask?? Well.... Sitting straddle on the floor in front of a panel of very serious
theater people for an audition ...only to later discover a huge hole
in my crotch and realize that I showed them my lady-goods: Hilarious!
Going to pay for an iced coffee at a bodega and flinging a feminine
product, rocket-launch-style, out of my bag with my wallet only to
watch it land between me and the awkward Latino man behind the
counter: Hilarious! Being on a date and my platform shoe sole
detaching from the rest of my foot so that I have to be carried piggy-back
back to my apartment: So Hilarious! ...(ps remind me to keep my tampons in another compartment and not to buy anymore
shoes at the Super Target)
Life is just a riot! That being said, it's also pretty good these days. I'm
working on a challenging show that I believe in, I've rocked a number
of auditions, I've met great people, I'm developing a new nutrition
business with a great partner, I'm graduating nutrition school...now
if I could just get my taxes done... Ah well! Can't win 'em all!
Being in the business of acting seems to be like being in
a relationship with a non-committal guy. He keeps coming around when
other things are going good. You can't put too much emphasis on him,
give him too much attention or weight because he gets elusive. Hard
to track down. Act like you don't need him, and he's around like
white on rice...
That being said, I have so many other
things going on that Acting is going pretty well!
I'm going to start freelancing with an agency (Woop! Step in the right
direction). I'm excited to see what opportunities and relationships come from that. I was also approached by the production company behind I
Married a Mobster to film a part in another pilot for Discovery ID. A "hyper emotional rape scene". The best compliment is when
people want to work with you again. Really, the highest form of
praise and I'm so excited to be a part of anything those peeps have
going on. So I'm scheduled for a rape on Monday! ... :-/ too far?...big surprise.
I've been rehearsing the crap out
of my new show, Happily After Tonight.
![]() |
Press Pic for Happily After Tonight. Red and Loup (played by Mateo Moreno) |
Learning to fight has been
somewhat of a challenge and I tend to get fairly hard on myself.
(“Aw, f*ck me.” seems to be my expletive of choice when I screw
things up. Classy, I know). I award everyone else time to learn and figure it out,
but me?? I should get it. First try. ...which I know is ridiculous.
Just some bad-assery. |
I had to laugh, as I was sitting on the
train on my way to rehearsal one morning, I noticed the warning label on my
escrima sticks (My weapon of choice in the show. That's right:
Weapon. ...did I mention I pull them from my CLOAK. I have a cloak. And weapons. Awesome.):
![]() |
...and they're trusting ME with these thingies?? |
So things are goin'! I've done a few
promo shifts (one hocking Olive Oil. I was serving Gazpacho and was
being hounded by the East Coast Sales Rep that had a few too many
glasses of the crisp white. At one point she reached across the table
and caused a Gazpacho debacle like you wouldn't believe. On the upside, my hands and forearms are as soft as a baby's
behind from a night spent soaked in the hydrating soup).
I'm also getting new headshots taken this week (Eek!!). Can't
wait to see what happens there.
So, I've got a couple (read: shit load)
of pokers in the fire. One of these days one of them is gonna tap the
log to make this thing blow. Right now I'm just enjoying the ride. :)
I think I'll leave you with a tune. As
I've said in the past, music is a big part of my “process” (as
those actory-folk like to say). Now, while I do live in Williamsburg,
my musical taste is a far cry from what these hipster-freaks are used
to. My music's not “cool” or “indie” or whatever other
adjectives the kids are using these days. It just gives me what I
need to get to where I'm going mentally. So here's a taste of what my
train ride audition-prep, dance-on-the-inside is set to. It keeps me brave in
the face of crazy theater people, chilled soup calamity, rape scenes,
dating, and fight sequence f*ck ups. ...Lord knows that's a tall
order.
Be well, friends. And stay brave.
One thing struck me in that little fight-practice video clip: in the midst of the ass-kicking, you're twirling those sticks. That's badass. If it looks that good in slow-mo, I'm sure your well-practiced work will look smashing (pun intended) in the final execution (ditto). I'm also left wondering just how the gazpacho-spilling sales rep was hounding you . . . was she a soul-sucker, a bloodsucker, a sapphic siren, or just demanding lots of table service? Too bad about the resulting mess -- I hope she offered to clean it. In any case, dark nights of the soul are normal. They come. And they go. It's good that you're enjoying life's process now!
ReplyDeleteGod Sarah you and I are so similar. It startles me sometimes when I re-realize it. What? That's a word. First of all I am right there with you on pre-audition rituals. I go in, do my thing and leave. I feel like if i spend time trilling, or shaking out my shoulders or whatever it actually makes me MORE nervous and tense. Like suddenly I've giving this audition WAY too much weight.
ReplyDeleteI'm also very similar to you with getting down on myself when I can't pick things up right away. For me it's Dance. Fighting comes easy but dance eludes me. Choreography. How do you? Why did you? When? What? Ugh. Mother Puss Bucket is my phrase of choice. Feel free to borrow that one.
AND...congrats on freelancing! Thinks are going really well for you and I couldn't be prouder. It's a good summer to be Sarah! (again I'm sorry I can't see your show. I'd like to see you fight if nothing else)
This is a exciting source of knowledge, Im glad I read this article. I am going to be back again soon to see more that you have.
ReplyDelete