Saturday morning. Here I sit. In bed.
Make-up from yesterday still smooshed across my face, looking like a three dollar
hooker on a Tuesday. Surrounded by the remnants of my manic life - Highlighted
scripts, vitamin bottles, articles of clothing, books, water bottles,
odd Christmas wrapping strewn about my room like a I fled suddenly
and could pack only what I could carry. In truth, this week nearly
killed me and my hot messiness was last on the list of things to
address.
It was one of those test weeks imposed
by the universe to see if my sanity stands up. I was multiple
personalities, changing intentions left and right, up and down.
Morning to night playing a different character every few hours.
It all started last weekend with The
Gate Agent. I was flown to Pittsburgh to film an ethereal short film
in which I played some creepy weird love child of the Angel Gabriel
and Dexter.
told ya. |
The hours were long. Very long. But at
the end of the marathon weekend, I was at the airport unloading my bag from the
producers car when he handed me an envelope.
“Here's your paycheck.”
I know I must have looked a bit odd in
my moment of hesitation, but I honestly felt like I was stealing from
this man. It's quite a feeling to make money doing the thing you love
the most. Payed to be my creative, nutty self for a fun filled
weekend surrounded by interesting people in a new city. You're
kidding, right?
On Set. With Writer- Mike Smith, Director Damiano Fusca, and Actor Amadeo Fusca |
More! Please! (...just thought
I'd boldly put that out into the Universe...)
I came home to business meetings on
Monday (after a hiatus for my partner's honeymoon we were PUMPED to get
back into the swing of things. Lots going down these days!)
Then it was full speed ahead for the
next days of 4:30am wake ups, odd jobs, shopping tours, pop up
auditions and call-backs. I would run from “Young Mom Selling
Blanket at Garage Sale” to “Unintentionally-Insulting, Jilted
Potential Lesbian” to “High End Shopping Concierge” to “Scarf
Peddler at Fancy-Schmance Cocktail Party” to “Health Guru with a
Potty Mouth” to “Plain Old Sarah attempting to have a Social
Life” to “Psychologist Talking Tourist Out of Body Image
Meltdown”...the list could go on. I subsisted on Protein Bars,
Green tea and baby carrots this week. ...with some fancy-party leftover
Cipriani Salmon thrown in the mix.
In a convo with my Father, I think he
summed it up pretty well, “Sarah. You get yourself into some shit.”
“...yes, Dad. Yes, I do.”
That being said, as the week came to a
close, I stood on my beloved L train on my way home from a date, with my feet aching so badly I
thought I may fall over, surrounded by tipsy, mustachioed hipsters ...and my heart was full. I mean, sure, along the way I
spilled coffee all over my face, was proposed to by a potential gang
leader, was unaware I was supposed to be in the midst of horrible
depression in an audition and went in as bright and chipper as a
cheerleader at Nationals. So, it's not to say I didn't have hiccups along
the way, however, I did not do a single thing this week that I didn't
love doing. How many people can say that?
I worked like a dog running
from opportunity to great job to opportunity.
I'm lucky. I may not know my ass from
my face at certain moments, but the goal all along has been to fill
my life with things that I love. Those things have changed along the
way and, Lord knows (and you all do, too, for that matter) I've
adapted. But last week, as I sat through a chemo treatment with a
good Actor-friend of mine, whose life has taken unexpected twists and
turns, I was completely impressed and in awe of her spirit. It's one that only
comes from having passion. And I want that. Constant re-invention,
learning, DOING.
I don't want to get overly cheesy and
my goal is not warm anyone's heart to the point of vomit inducing.
But I'm a happy camper over here. Exhausted and beyond enjoying these
pajamas and this bed and this cup of tea like my puppy-nephew Lincoln enjoyed
Thanksgiving:
but a happy camper. 'Nuff said.
...well almost 'nuff. Other news!!
I was cast in a show this week, also.
Details to come!
And...
I'm gonna be an Aunt! My full, official title will
be “Fun Aunt Sarah.” (FAS for short, according to my brother, so that it leaves the F up to interpretation... he's a delight. :)
You may not know this, but I have a
fear of Pregnant women. It's nothing personal, and I know it's not
catching...it's just the whole thing kinda creeps me out. I mean how does this happen?! ...I mean, I know HOW, how ...it's just so weird! I spent Thanksgiving
with my sister-in-law occasionally grabbing my hand and sticking it
on her belly to feel the alien...I mean baby, kick. I would respond
with desperate whimpers and, “Mom! Ugggh. Mom! She's making me touch it!"
...but, truth: I have a new found obsession with baby stores. I can't stop. I'm gonna love the crap out of this
kid. ...not that it will need any help with that.
So, here's to December! I'll raise my lower calorie, vegan Nog to a productive and celebratory month of awesome.
So far, so good.
Yay, love it all! Congrats and get some good rest for Christmas. xxoo
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