My eyes popped open like they were
spring loaded. I laid there motionless.
*rustle rustle*
I sat straight up.
Rocket launched my torso to meet a 90 degree angle with my legs.
*Rustle bang bang
rustle*
I lurched forward
on all fours. Quick. Stealthy. And perched at the end of my bed.
Tilted my head in the direction of the noise. Body rigid. Breath
stopped.
Silence...
Silence...
*BANG. Rustle.
BANG. Rustle.*
What. The. Shit.
I looked to the
corner of my room and saw the box from my new space heater shift
slightly. Then again. First thought: Aliens. Second thought (more
rational, I think): ...Mouse.
Dun dun dunnnn...
Ever since they
started construction on the new laundromat downstairs we've had a few
sightings of some surprisingly cute, but definitely unwanted mice.
After a few pantry items were found with teeth marks, I cleaned out
the kitchen of anything mouse-accessible and filled only some traps
with edibles.
But it's like the
damn things are evolved! They are smart as all-get-out. Deliberately
avoiding anything made of black plastic that could bring about their
downfall.
However...apparently,
they are not immune to falling into open boxes. You have GOT to be
kidding me.
I slowly climbed
down off of my bed, aware of every creek made from my bare feet. Ever
so delicately I walked towards the box. Gathering courage from
somewhere deep inside I gradually peeked over the edge...When
suddenly, “Oh Shit!!!”
I screamed and
jumped back as it leaped up against the side of the box, seemingly
coming right for my face. It slammed hard against the side of the
box with a thud, followed by radio silence...I started to walk toward
it again when, SLAM!
...unbelievable.
I spent the next
half hour on the phone with my night owl father as he pep-talked me
into getting close enough to the box without freaking out and
screaming obscenities to close it up and tote the little fucker
downstairs for a release into the wild. I felt like I should tag his
ear before he scampered off behind the garbage bins.
There are a couple
lessons in this here story:
- Mice have ups. Turns out those little bastards can jump. Beware.
- Even the smartest can fall into a trap sometimes
And recently, I
have to tell you, I've felt an odd kinship with that adorable yet
disgusting little mouse in the box. You see, there's been something
else other than the extra holiday 5 weighing on me. For some reason,
my birthday this past year didn't effect me, but the turn of the
calender made things very real. THIS year, 2013, I will turn 30. And
that is terrifying.
I started off January feeling trapped
in this monumental feeling. Dwarfed by this 2000 lb, 30 yr old
gorilla swinging from the highrise above my head. I've fallen into
thinking that I “should have” this and “should have done”
that. ...but I don't, and I haven't.
It was jabbing at my ribs. One would
think that it would force me to action, but instead somehow it
created a debilitating stillness. It captured my ambition and
produced an inability to act, for fear of running out of time for
“acceptable” failure.
(Not to mention dealing with the mere number. 30. Hell, I still feel 17. I should be hiding my alcohol from my parents and studying for my Social Studies test. How am I going to be 30?!)
(Not to mention dealing with the mere number. 30. Hell, I still feel 17. I should be hiding my alcohol from my parents and studying for my Social Studies test. How am I going to be 30?!)
But, unlike the mouse, I've nothing but
myself to get me out of this rut. This feeling. I must simply force myself to action. I
set up meetings, work on shows, write, audition, whatever. Just move.
It's easy to get into comparison mode.
I mean hell, the Olsen twins were TV's Michelle before they could
even walk. Kirsten Dunst and Julia Stiles have careers (I mean,
really?!). I would have blown Anne Hathaway's Rachel Getting Married
out of the water.
...but that's not MY path. So, I've got
to accept mine without judgment or negativity. Bitch-slap my brain into submission, settle in and enjoy
the process. However long it takes...
But that does not mean that I coast.
Hell. To the. No. I work. I work, and I question little. Because,
lets be honest, the really good questions have no answers.
So, aside from
rescuing disgusting rodents from death by cardboard box, I've been
quite the busy bee. Christmas time came and went, and I finally found
myself in the Holiday Spirit after snuggling a puppy, decorating a
tree and forcing my family into wearing stupid hats for a photo-op:
Both my father and Lincoln wanted to kill me... |
Then came New
Years. My friends and I, rather than spend shit loads of money on a
mediocre night on the town, decided to have a nice little old school
style slumber party (And, no, boys. We don't actually pillow fight.
Sorry to blow up your 13year old wet dream).
NYE. Pillow Fight not included. |
Now, I'm full
speed ahead with the nutrition business. It's almost ready for
release into the universe and I can't wait because right now I feel
so selfish holding onto it. Which I guess is a great way to feel
about one's entrepreneurial efforts.
![]() |
Sneak Peek! Rachel and me. ...coming soon! |
I'm rehearsing a
full length show for the end of February. It's a big undertaking, so
I'm working hard on that. Also going to be doing a monologue night in
Mid February. I was partnered with a killer playwright and I am so
pumped to see what he comes up with for me. We met over coffee to get
to know one another and chatted about life and family and the
scariest way we can think of to die. ...just another business
meeting...
So, while I'm
trying to relax into the timing of my life, my goals are not
slacking. 95% of my resolutions from last year were met within the
first 6 months, I plan on repeating that success rate but times a
million (that doesn't mathematically make sense...but you know what I
mean.)
I have big
freakin' plans, my friends. I will not be trapped by the pestering “shoulds” of 30. You heard it first.
I've done a lot in
my 29.25 years. And truth be told, I'm loving life. Which is really
the ultimate goal anyhow.
Now, if you'll
excuse me, I'm gonna shut the hell up and get to work. :)
(p.s. I wish you all a killer 2013! Health and happiness and amazing things.)
(p.s. I wish you all a killer 2013! Health and happiness and amazing things.)
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